Joke of the day

A man and a boy are walking through the woods in the dark. The boy says "gosh, it sure is spooky out here". The man says "how do you think I feel kid? I gotta walk out of here by myself".

I'm not even sorry, you brought this on yourselves with these horrible puns.
 
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JACKBURTON said:
A man and a boy are walking through the woods in the dark. The boy says "gosh, it sure is spooky out here". The man says "how do you think I feel kid? I gotta walk out of here by myself".

I'm not even sorry, you brought this on yourselves with these horrible puns.
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oh that's dark LOLOL
 
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Bob comes in from a round of golf and sits at the bar, clearly in pain and barely able to speak. When pressed by his friends he explains I sliced badly on number five and my ball went out of bounds into that cow pasture on the right. There was lady golfer also searching for a lost ball in there, so I gave her a smile and a wave. This damn cow is just standing around watching us search and chewing it’s cud when I notice a golf ball stuck in its vulva. I know it’s not mine because the ball is neon yellow and I play a white ball.

So I called the lady over, lifted the cow‘s tail and asked her: “Hey, does this look like yours?” and she whacked me in the throat with her nine iron.
 
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Seeing as it is St. Patrick’s Day…..I just learned something interesting about the capital city of Ireland. It has been experiencing exponential population growth over the last few years. No wonder they call it Dublin!
 
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I'll combine both themes:

A golfer gets a hole in one and out pops a leprechaun. The leprechaun tells him he is entitled to a wish, so the guy asks to be "a bit larger" down there. It grows so much it drags on the ground by the 18th hole. To fix it, he has to make another hole-in-one. When he finally does, the leprechaun offers another wish. The golfer frantically yells, "Make my legs longer!"

I'll log out now...
 
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