Friday Joke

AccountsReceivable@DRC

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Mar 25, 2008
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A man is skydiving, enjoying his free-fall, when he realizes that he has reached the altitude where he must open his parachute. So he pulls on the rip cord, but nothing happens.

“No problem,” he says to himself, “I still have my emergency chute.” So he pulls the rip cord on his emergency parachute, and once again, nothing happens.

Now the man begins to panic. “What am I going to do?” he thinks, “I’m a goner!”

Just then he sees a man flying upwards - from the earth - towards him. He can’t figure out where this man is coming from, or what he’s doing, but he thinks to himself, “Maybe he can help me. If he can’t, then I’m done for.”

When the man gets close enough to him, the skydiver cups his hands and shouts down, “Hey, do you know anything about parachutes?”

"No....nothing" the other man replies - "do you know anything about gas stoves?”
 
A frog walks into a bank. He goes to the only open teller, and sees that her name is Paddy Whack. "Hey, listen" says the frog. "I really need a loan! I'm out of work, and my wife and tadpoles are at home starving! I need money so I can feed them and provide for them!"

Now Paddy feels very sorry for the poor frog and asks him if he has any collateral. He holds up a small glass elephant. Paddy is a little surprised by this, and quite unsure, but she feels so sorry for the poor frog that she takes the elephant to her manager. "Mr. Dooley, sir," Paddy begins "there is a frog out there who desperately needs a loan. He's out of work and he has a wife and tadpoles who are at home starving. He needs some money so he can provide for them! But all he has for collateral is this little glass elephant. What should I do?"

Well...Mr. Dooley takes a good hard look at that elephant, thinks about it a little, and then replies, "It's a knick-knack, Paddy Whack, give the frog a loan!"


A police officer sees a man driving on the highway with a pickup truck full of penguins. Completely astonished - he pulls the guy over. The officer says to the man "you can't drive around town with all these bloody penguins in the truck! Take them to the zoo immediately...."

The guy replied "I will...thanks..." and drove away. The next day, the officer sees the guy again...driving around with the truck full of penguins. He then notices they're all wearing sunglasses. He pulls the guy over again and says - "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?".

The guy replied, "I did...thanks for the tip. Today I'm taking them to the beach!"...
 
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